Surely you know that too: no matter where you are, you meet people everywhere that you would prefer to avoid. Today we will show you how to ...
If you could, you would like to turn around and leave immediately, but in some situations, this is simply not possible. Admittedly, sometimes your counterpart makes a fool of himself and in those moments it can be quite amusing, but most of the time it's just annoying. In this article, we will show you what types of difficult people there are and how you can deal with them better in the future and spare your nerves.
Four Types of Difficult People - How to deal with difficult people
Whether men or women, office, internet or family: there are people everywhere who drive you crazy. But there is not THE difficult person, but several types and each of them behaves differently. Here we introduce you to the four most well-known types and show you how to deal with difficult people:
The Neurotic
Who does not know that? The eternal naysayers who are pessimistic about everything, badmouth every idea, and always start their arguments with a “but”? No matter what you propose, first, the negative sides are examined in detail and backed up with arguments that are sometimes very far-fetched. Absurd examples from the circle of acquaintances who allegedly have already tried it and of course failed miserably to complete the picture. There's nothing good about your idea, end of discussion.
They see problems and difficulties everywhere, and as soon as they have solved one, the next problem comes their way. Every little thing becomes a catastrophe: be it the unannounced rain or a spontaneous change of plan. But woe betides you dare even once to gently point out their exaggerations. Then you're the bad guy who just has no idea.
As entertaining as it may be at first, the more you are confronted with this behavior, the more exhausting it becomes. But the conversation is often unavoidable. But you don't have to watch helplessly. Make it clear to the neurotic that you don't want to criticize this person at all, you just want to discuss something on a factual level. Formulate clear sentences and avoid formulations with "could" and "it would be possible". You should remain friendly while still getting your point across.
The Selfish
Your counterpart is the boss - at least that's what he thinks, whether it's true or not doesn't matter. You have to dance to his tune, not to question him and certainly not to express criticism. What he says is the law. Either it is done as he says or not at all.
This type of person is often represented in leading positions in business, in politics, and on television. The beautiful word “I” occurs in every sentence. They want everything, as quickly as possible and in their own way. Their self-confidence knows no bounds and every weakness in the interlocutor is exploited. You hardly have the opportunity to speak for yourself and express your opinion. It annoys you and maybe it makes you angry too.
But you don't have to live with this behavior. It may not be easy for you, but it is best to respond positively to the other person's point of view. Give him positive feedback and reinforce his decisions. You don't have to agree with everything, but if you say that you don't think the suggestion is that bad or that the reasoning is very clever, many selfish people open up to a serious conversation. Just remember every time: the smarter ones give in! Then you put on a friendly smile, give the person positive feedback and let them finish. If your counterpart has then opened up, you present your solution in a friendly manner. Many egoists are impressed when you remain polite and firm despite everything but still, respond to them.
However, when you encounter a hardcore selfishness, there is no way to counter it. Stay relaxed and continue being friendly, and postpone the conversation. Unfortunately, there is no other solution.
The Hypersensitive
You don't answer the phone every time you call and immediately receive thousands of accusations in the mailbox. Busy and can't respond to the text message? Then you can have no interest in this person! At least that's what hypersensitive people think. Any criticism, no matter how small, even if it is not meant in a bad way, is perceived as negative and hurtful.
Hypersensitive people are insecure, need a lot of attention and their mood can change from overjoyed to depressed and back again in a matter of seconds without you realizing what you have done wrong again. If you don't see the person for a day or come home late after work and don't feel like talking, the person immediately suspects that something is wrong with you. Often the behavior is reminiscent of that of an insecure child who needs a lot of attention and love, and when adults behave like this, it's just plain exhausting.
If you know this all too well, we have good news for you: because there are ways to deal with these people without jeopardizing your friendship, relationship or professional partnership. When conversing with hypersensitive people, be careful to avoid innuendo, sarcasm, and irony, and be precise and to the point. Stay friendly, because any wrong comment can immediately be interpreted as an attack.
Even if it's annoying, answer every message as promptly as possible and apologize for any delays. If you can't reply until later, for example, because of a meeting, explain politely that it has nothing to do with the person themselves. Avoid interrupting the person and congratulate them on their birthday, wedding anniversary, and other important anniversaries. Ask about this person regularly without being prompted, as this will show them that there is no reason to doubt your friendship/relationship.
The Choleric
We all know choleric, they are unavoidable. Without warning, they see you as a red rag and take their anger out on you. Some go nuts over every little thing, others store all their anger up and eventually explode for no apparent reason. These outbursts of anger are loud, often banging on the table, some even throwing their keys and other objects. Others glare at you, clench their fists, and blush. It is not uncommon for the person to unpack all the insults they can find against you. Their behavior corresponds to that of a child, sometimes reminiscent of adolescents in puberty.
Cholerics are also referred to as irascible. But in the end, there is nothing more behind this behavior than insecurity and the desire for attention and understanding. Unfortunately, all you can do is put on a thick skin and wait for the storm to pass. When the point is reached, you objectively emphasize that you understand his point of view and suggest finding a solution together.
Dealing with difficult people: Conclusion and general tips
We have introduced you to four groups of people who are generally considered difficult. But keep in mind that there are also mixed types and that each of us can be difficult at times. In most cases, staying relaxed and polite helps when dealing with difficult people. Don't take the attacks personally. Try to listen as best you can and respond to the other person.
If you encounter a difficult person but are stressed and annoyed at the moment, you should try to keep your distance. If you can't avoid a confrontation, don't back down. Don't let yourself be pushed around and clearly show where your limits lie. Sometimes a person gets upset about something that was actually caused by another problem. Find out why the other person is angry and try to find a solution. If you follow these tips and always try to keep a cool head, you will find that it makes your life easier and saves your nerves!
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